Thursday, December 6, 2012

STREEEEEEESSSSSSSSS




GOODMORNINGMYFRIENDS

Nigeria is a West African nation of over 100 million energetic people.
 It is endowed with lots of natural resources but lacks human resources. 
Philip Emeagwali 




Subject: STREEEEEEESSSSSSSSS 

 
!!!!!!!!!!! One of the best IT interviews !!!!!!!!
Interviewer: Tell me about yourself.

Candidate: I am Rameshwar Kulkarni. I did my Tele Communication engineering from BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology.

Interviewer: BabanRao Dhole-Patil Institute of Technology? I had never heard of this college before!

Candidate: Great! Even I had not heard of it before getting an admission into it .. What happened is - due to cricket world cup I scored badly! in 12th.I was getting a paid seat in a good college. But my father said (I prefer to call him 'baap') - "I can not invest so much of money".(The baap actually said - "I will never waste so much of money on you"). So I had to join this college. Frankly speaking this name - BabanRao Dhole-Patil, can at the most be related to a Shetakari Mahavidyalaya. 

Interviewer: Ok, ok. It seems you have taken 6 years to complete your engineering. 

Candidate: Actually I tried my best to finish it in 4 years.. But you know, these cricket matches and football world cup, and tennis tournaments. It is difficult to concentrate. So I flunked in 2nd and 3rd year. So in all I took 4 + 2 = 7 years. 

Interviewer: But 4+2 is 6. 

Candidate: Oh, is it? You know I always had KT in maths. But I will try to keep this in mind. 4+2 is 6, good, thanks. These cricket matches really affect exams a lot. I think they should ban it. 

Interviewer: Good to know that you want cricket matches to be banned. 

Candidate: No, no... I am talking about Exams!! 

Interviewer: Ok, What is your biggest achievement in life?

Candidate: Obviously, completing my Engineering. My mom never thought I would complete it. In fact, when i flunked in 3rd year, she was looking for a job for me in BEST (Bus corporation in Maharashtra ) through some relative. 

Interviewer: Do you have any plans of higher study? 

Candidate: he he he.. Are you kidding? Completing 'lower' education itself was so much of pain!! 

Interviewer: Let's talk about technical stuff. On which platforms have you worked? 

Candidate: Well, I work at SEEPZ, so you can say Andheri is my current platform. Earlier I was at Vashi center. So Vashi was my platform then. As you can see I have experience of different platforms! (Vashi and Andheri are the places in Mumbai) 

Interviewer: And which languages have you used? 

Candidate: Marathi, Hindi, English. By the way, I can keep quiet in German, French, Russian and many other languages. 

Interviewer: Why VC is better than VB? 

Candidate: It is a common sense - C comes after B. So VC is a higher version than VB. I heard very soon they are coming up with a new language VD!

Interviewer: Do you know anything about Assembly Language?

Candidate: Well, I have not heard of it. But I guess, this is the language our ministers and MPs use in assembly.

Interviewer: What is your general project experience? 

Candidate: My general experience about projects is - most of the times they are in pipeline!

Interviewer: Can you tell me about your current job? 

Candidate: Sure, Currently I am working for Bata InfoTech ltd. Since joining BIL, I am on Bench. Before joining BIL, I used to think that Bench was software like Windows. 

Interviewer: Do you have any project management experience? 

Candidate: No, but I guess it shouldn't be difficult. I know Word and Excel.. I can talk a lot. I know how to dial for International phone call and use speaker facility. And very important - I know few words like - 'Showstoppers ' , 'hotfixes', 'SEI-CMM','quality' ,'version control ','deadlines' , 'Customer Satisfaction' etc. Also I can blame others for my mistakes! 

Interviewer: What are your expectations from our company? 

Candidate: Not much. 
        1. I should at least get 60,000 in hand. 
        2. I would like to work on a live EJB project. But it should not have deadlines.
            I personally feel that pressure affects natural talent. 
        3. I believe in flexi-timings. 
        4. Dress code is against basic freedom, so I would like to wear  t-shirt and jeans. 
        5. We must have sat-sun off. I will suggest Wednesday off also, so as to
            avoid breakdown due to overwork. 
       6. I would like to go abroad 3 times a year on short term preferably 1-2 months)
          assignments. Personally I prefer US, Australia and Europe . But considering
          the fact that there is Olympic
coming up in U K in the current year, I don't
          mind going there in that period.

          As you can see I am modest and don't have many expectations. So can I
          assume my selection?

Interviewer: He he he ha ha ha. Thanks for your interest in our organization. In fact I was never entertained so much before.You are welcome to join us. 

The fellow was appointed in a newly created section 'Stress Management' in the HRD.

 
 SMILE
BE HAPPY
HAVE A GREAT DAY







VISIT







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